Murray Mayhem and Madness
by DSISandraPullman39
Summary: When political world gets too much, when there doesn't seem to be any reason to get up again and do it all the next day, there's always home and when home is as mad as the Murray house suddenly politics doesn't seem so bad after all!
1. Homecoming Chaos

**Murray Mayhem and Madness 1/?**

**Disclaimer:-** Don't own them just borrowing!

**Episode:- **Odd spoilers for throughout series 3

**Pairing:- **None

**Rating:- **T/M (Mainly for language)

**Achieve:- ** **http(:/) . /group/rebeccafrontlewisffarchive/**

**Summary:-** When political world gets too much, when there doesn't seem to be any reason to get up again and do it all the next day, there's always home and when home is as mad as the Murray house suddenly politics doesn't seem so bad after all!

**Author's Note:- **I think the whole concept of Nicola's home life is under-covered in fic so this will be a series of little snap shots the chapters won't be overly long but there is likely to be a lot of them over time. Based around the time of series 3 so 2009ish; hope you enjoy and reviews would be delightful as always!

Homecoming chaos

"Mum! Mum tell Eliza that she can't just come into my room and bug me when I'm trying to read!" Welcome home mummy so glad you back after three days away! That's my youngest daughter and I have quite literally not gotten far enough in the door to close it yet and she's coming down the stairs at a rate of knots and throwing herself into my arms, not to welcome me home you understand but to complain about her sister.

"I just wanted her to look at my new school athletics kit she's such a bitch I…"

"Eliza that's enough and do not use that sort of language about your sister. If you give ma two minutes to get in the door I'll look at your kit and you can tell me how your meet went yesterday but seriously girls can I actually make it off the doorstep before you start?" I should point out that I love my children. I would do anything for them, fight the biggest threat to keep them safe and lay down my life if it meant that they would be happy and healthy for the rest of their lives. That said when you've spent three days immersed in strategy meetings, press intrusion and government cock-ups what you really want is to get in to the house, change and relax before they start throwing their complaints at you! "Where are Emily, Toby and Daddy?"

"Toby's in his room with Harry they have been locked in there all day working on something amazing for their science project. Daddy is out, he says he'll be late we both know what that means…." My oldest daughter has no illusions left where her father is concerned a fact that saddens me. I've always believed in not influencing my kids opinions on their father or anything else for that matter, they are individuals with minds of their own. Now that none of them are little children anymore they have their own personalities and I'm more than willing to let them express those. It doesn't change the fact that Emily's disillusionment with James is sad. "Ella, Eliza give Mummy a break for ten minutes will you?"

"You don't get to tell me what to do!"

"Yeah Emily just cause you're the oldest doesn't mean…"

I've finally managed to make it out of the hall and dropped my boxes on the dining table while the three of them continue to argue. Yes I know I should step in but trust me a life time of experience has shown me that when the three of them get going unless physical violence becomes an issue leaving them to it is best. It amazes me that Toby seems to be able to complete zone it out the girls will always weigh in, Emily will hear Eliza and Ella argue and immediately get into the middle of it, Ella will hear the other two argue and do the same and Eliza is always ready to jump in with both feet if Ella and Emily are going at it but yet Toby just stays out of the way. I'm not sure if that's a male thing or just because of them all he has the most sense!

"Yeah well you both need to cut it out and…"

I've managed to get past them again hearing yet another snippet of the argument as I make it upstairs to the bedroom James and I share to finally get out of these clothes. I put them on 12 hours ago but frankly it feels like I've been wearing them for 12 months. All I want right now is to have a hot shower, put on something comfortable, pour a glass of wine and catch up with my children properly. If they ever stop fighting that is.

"Hi guys, how's it going? Toby do you need anything before I go shower?" With a brief knock I've put my head round my son's door to find him and his best friend Harry engrossed in something that looks like there are too many wires and too much potential for explosions for my liking.

"No thanks Mum we're fine did you have a good conference or team building thing or whatever it was?" He hasn't even looked up from what he's doing as he holds two wires together and Harry solders them together. At least he asked though.

"Yeah it was fine. Toby are you sure you should be doing that in the house? It looks a bit dangerous." So shoot me for wanting to make sure my house doesn't blow up taking us all with it!

"It's fine Mum the earth wire is connected to the transformer there and it means that these two wires are grounded and so until we connect the windmill and complete the circuit it'll be fine. It's like basic physics 101 we wanted to do a 12 point circuit with a dual power source and really show how renewable energy could revolutionise the world but Mr Wilson has no vision."

"He's right Mrs Murray it's fine this is like primary school stuff. It's completely safe."

"Ok, well be careful anyway boys. Toby I'll make something for dinner as soon as I've cleaned up and changed, Harry are you staying for dinner?"

"Dad said it was ok for him to stay the night since it's Friday." Of course he did, anything for a quiet life!

"Ok we'll I'll call you both for food later." I've left them to it and am back in my bedroom ready to finally shower. Didn't I mention my son is the next Albert Einstein in the making? I'm not sure where he got his brains it sure as hell wasn't from me nor his father when he talks half times it goes completely over my head. Anyway time to make the startling transformation from incompetent cabinet minister to barely competent mother and let the weekend begin with whatever it has to throw at me this week.


	2. Bathtime Eavesdropping

**** For authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Murray Mayhem and Madness 2/?**

Bath time eavesdropping 

"Mum can I come in?" Emily has just appeared at my bedroom door, before I even had a chance to get undressed, holding out a glass of wine. "I've calmed Eliza and Ella down and they're sulking in their rooms you much be exhausted how did you thing go?"

"Same as always, too much yelling not enough progress. How have things been here please tell me Daddy at least hung around while I was away he hasn't been leaving you to look after them ever evening has he?" Ah I should fill you in here. James Murray, my husband of almost twenty years, father of my four children, business man, serial adulterer and all round bastard. Why do I stay with him? Trust me right now there isn't enough time or enough inclination on my part to go into that, suffice to say I do, at least for the next few years, and leave it at that for now. Problem is that when I have to go away I'm never really sure how much help he's going to be around the house and our days of having a live in Nanny are long gone. Now we have a fantastic housekeeper called Rosie who comes in from 3 till 6 every day to be there for the kids coming home and make sure they eat something half way sensible for dinner. Normally one of us is in by six every evening or not long after it and Emily doesn't mind mucking in when needs be but when I'm away I have no idea what's going on and I know he takes advantage.

"You know what it's like Mum, look I brought you this why don't you go have a bath and chill out a bit and then we can order in for dinner you know what it's like when Toby has a Harry over it wouldn't matter what you make you'll not please everyone. We can order pizza that way they can all get what they want."

"And how many of the last three nights have you all had takeaway food Emily?" She knows that I know James has a habit of "forgetting" to shop when I go away and telling Rosie to just order the kids something in. Normally I circumvent that by shopping before I go but the emergency nature of this meant I didn't get a chance.

"We were fine, honestly mum you look like hell go have a bath and I'll see you after that we can get them all fed and catch up on some TV or something."

How do you argue with a sixteen year old who is mothering you rather than the other way around? A bath does sound fantastic though.

"Guys I'm going for a bath if you need the loo use the downstairs one!" Trust me it is vital in this house to warn everyone when the bathroom is going to be occupied. We do have a lock on the door but it is about as much use as quiet and reasoned arguments are where Malcolm is concerned. If you turn the handle and push the lock surrenders and before you know it you have company in the bathroom during your relaxing bath.

I love a bath but I generally only have one very late at night when the kids are all in bed and the house is quiet. Why? Well on one side is a wall shared with Toby's bedroom and on the other a wall shared with Eliza's. Right now I'm getting live football from my daughter's room and a heated debate around the relative values of metal and moulded plastic sails for the boy's science project windmill. I know this is going to sound weird but I find it oddly reassuring tonight that life is going on as normal. Don't get me wrong just like every other parent in the world there is no sound as wonderful as when all your children are sleeping soundly, but tonight when I've not seen them for a few days lying here in the bath with a cold glass of wine listening and eaves dropping on their normal evening behaviour is the most amazing thing on earth.

I spend my days listening to grown men yell at each other like kids in a playground. I listen to logical slim rows over things that vary in importance from how many paperclips we've used that month to whether we should impose immigration limits. I feel like I am stuck in the middle of the biggest joke in political history and walk out of the office feeling like nothing will ever make sense. Then I come home and listen to them as they interact with each other and let them fill me in on their days and everything seems to immediately put into perspective. They remind me why I'm doing all this in the first place and tonight just those familiar sounds have taken away the last of the tension in my body and set me up for a weekend of catching up with them properly. I intend to spend the next two days completely immersed in my family, enjoying my children's company and trying not to care that if I see my husband at all before Sunday night it will be a miracle. Who needs him or any other the other men who make my days more stressful? With my fantastic kids and 48 hours of free time ahead what could possibly be better.


	3. Stepping in

**** For authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

***** Also covers the Sports Challenge – To write a fic where two people are supporting opposite sides in a sporting event.**

**Murray Mayhem and Madness 3/?**

Stepping in

"Right are we all hungry? Will I order now?" I feel like a whole new woman after my bath and now I can't wait to spend some time with my kids but two seconds in the sitting room and I can feel a storm brewing. Not, for once with me at the centre, but with Eliza and Ella. Again!

"Mum tell Ella I'm allowed to watch the Rugby now, if Daddy was here he'd be watching it too and she wouldn't dare argue!"

"Ella, honey come and help me pick what we're going to order for dinner, let Liza watch her rugby match and tell me what you've been up to when I was away."

"Yeah Ells tell Mum about your English report, she'll be interested unlike Dad." Emily has jumped in now and from the look on Ella's face I get the impression James has put his fucking foot in it again. Why can't he pretend to be interested, even if he doesn't actually give a shit about what his kids are doing why can't he pretend for a couple of days while I'm away?

"I don't want to, it was crap if it hadn't been Dad would have wanted to hear it I….."

"Ella, I want to hear it doesn't that count for something? I'm sure it's not crap."

"It wasn't Mum she got a commendation in assembly because it was so great, they wanted you or dad to be there but he wouldn't go and you weren't here so she's been in a mood about it since. I read it though and it was great." I know all my children, I know their moods and can read them pretty well and right now in spite of Emily's assurances that Ella's report was fantastic, which I don't doubt for a second, she isn't in the mood to share it. Chalk one more up to James's fucking apathy.

"Why didn't you let me know I'd have tried to get back…Ella don't ignore me I….." Shit! She's wandered back off into the sitting room where Eliza has sprawled out on the sofa to watch the England Australia match and I feel like kicking something, actually I feel like kicking James but since he's not here a cupboard, a door, a wall, just about anything would do.

"Leave her Mum she wants to tell you and she will over the weekend she's just pissed off because Dad was such a wanker about it."

"Emily language please." Yes I'm aware I'm being completely hypocritical but she's 16 I have to at least pretend to be appalled by her choice of words even if I agree with them completely. "OK what shall we order? Are we still going for Pizza?"

"Where's you sense of national pride! You're such a bitch Ella I….."

"Wow! What's going on in here?" I've left Emily to order pizza for everyone and walked right into the middle of another slanging match. God I swear it's like being back at the department at times when this lot get going, except of course that they have an excuse being kids, Ollie, Glen and Malcolm don't yet they can still act like it at times.

"All I said was I wanted Australia to win, I like Australia that's where Neighbours and Home and Away are set."

"And we're English so you should be supporting England."

"I'll support who I want to support! I don't want to support England you support England and I….."

"OK enough!" I was so determined not to raise my voice tonight but there comes a point when the only way to ensure that we don't spend the night constantly at each other's throats is to step in. "Eliza I don't mind you watching the Rugby but you don't make a point of winding your sister up while you do it or I'll turn it off. Ella I know you're pissed off because I wasn't here and Daddy let you down but deliberately picking the opposite side in the match because you know it will irritate Eliza is not acceptable. I am home now and I want to hear about your report and everything else that happened while I was away. I'm sorry that yet again I had to go leave you all for a few days but now that I'm back I had hoped we could spend the weekend together and make up for the fact I haven't seen you all in days but if that's too much to ask how about we all just eat and then go to bed because I have had all the playground infighting I can take being stuck in a hotel with Glen and Malcolm for the last 4 days. So what's it going to be? A fun evening and a relaxing weekend or constant arguing and stress so none of us actually enjoys the couple of days we have got together?"

They are staring at each other now like they can't quite decide if it's worth breaking off hostilities but I can see them waver. Emily calming them down short term is one thing but when it comes to properly stepping in and getting this weekend back on track there's no one like Mum and now that they've grudgingly agreed to my conditions the weekend can really begin.


	4. The Bard and the Olympian

**** For authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1**

**Murray Mayhem and Madness 4/?**

The Bard and the Olympian

"So then I had to get up in front of the whole school and read my report. Polly Smith-Roberts was so cross because she said the only reason I was able to make my report better than anyone else's was because you were a minister but I told Mrs Atkins that I did it by myself and she believed me which is why mine was picked and I got to present it to the whole school!" Our food has arrived and now we're all sitting around with slices of pizza as my four children, and Harry of course, finally decide it's time to fill me in on what I missed while I was away. Ella has got over her sulk and has filled me in on her report on political symbolism in "Alice in Wonderland" and I'm bursting with pride at the fact that in spite of the fact I wasn't there to see her she's been able to put forward her argument to the whole school and done it with the sort of confidence I hope I've instilled in all of them.

"That's amazing Ella maybe later you can read it to me." I love it when she smiles, sometimes I think of all of them she is most affected by everything that has changed since I somehow managed to find myself thrown into the middle of the madness of the front benches. When I think of the way I seemed to give up too easily on her education in favour of a quiet life where James was concerned it makes my blood run cold. Now and then though, amongst all the repercussions of that decision, she shines through and I remember that where she's concerned location means nothing. She is my own little superstar, she has a way with words and a confidence in presenting them that I envy and am in awe of at the same time and that isn't dependant on which school gate she walks through in the morning.

"Next week we start are new topic, we're doing George Orwell for the winter term can we go tomorrow and get the books? I have a list I want to get started. Please Mummy can…."

"Yes! Yes of course we can calm down or you're going to choke on your pizza." We're all laughing now as she finally stops bouncing around excitedly and I can see Eliza rolling her eyes. My children have very different talents and while Ella is my book worm Eliza is all about sport. She reads what she absolutely has to, and she cannot understand how Ella considers a trip to Waterstones in Oxford Street an exciting way to spend a Saturday afternoon.

"God Ella you are such a geek! If we're going into Oxford Street Mum I need new shin guards. I scored two goals when we played St Catherine's this week Daddy said I was fab but that when you came back I had to tell you to get me new guards because the ones I have are getting too short!"

"First of all don't speak to your sister like that, she's not a geek she just likes different things to you. Secondly you didn't tell me you had an inter-school match this week!" I can see Ella sink further back into the sofa and I know it's nothing to do with her sister's insult; they throw names at each other day in day out. James obviously made time to go to Eliza's football match, he always finds time for her games whether it's football or hockey or whatever she is doing he's there on the side lines cheering her on. She's the son he always wanted Toby to be and of all of them she's the only one he makes an effort for. Emily and Toby have long ago stopped caring but it still hurts Ella, she wants him to be proud of her like he is of Eliza and I hate him for the fact he can't even pretend to take an interest.

"You weren't going to be here anyway and Daddy had already said he'd come, it was a great match you should have seen me Mum the second goal I scored I was at the other end of the pitch and I dribbled past all of their defenders and scored from half way line. We won 2-1 and I scored both our goals!"

"Amazing sweetie, I'm sorry I missed it, we'll get your new shin guards tomorrow when we go for Ella's books." Now she's happy too and I can see that Toby is desperate to fill me in on his and Harry's project and I know that Emily had an audition at her dance class this week for their Christmas show. I've heard from my very own future Bard, and our future Olympian now it's time for them to tell me how their week has gone and then the weekend can start in earnest.


End file.
